Hello my love,
You've been so stressed lately. I wish I knew a way to make it easier for you. I do everything I know how to and everything I can think of to help, but sometimes I feel like it isn't enough. I feel like there is always something else I could do if I could only think of it. I don't know, I worry that I don't do enough to show you that I'm here for you. I know you're a very internal person and that it's hard to put your stress into words, so I try to push you to talk about it and I never know if that's helpful or hurtful. I promise I'm always just trying my best to help.
Lately we've been joking about what our first dance will be. Today you suggested Andrew W. K.'s party hard. I laughed so hard at work that I had to explain why I was laughing to a manager (who was right next to me). You always do put a smile on my face. Whether it's because you're being goofy or kind or sweet or just because I look at you and know that you are mine. I've been called so many things over the course of my life (both good and bad) but being called your's is my favorite and I think it always will be.
You're on call these next two weeks and I know that's your like least favorite thing ever. I am so amazed by how hard you work and it's clear that you're respected at work (even if you annoy people sometimes.) Maybe I'll try to do something fun for you while you're on call this time to make it suck a little bit less.
Fuck, I'm so in love with you. Sometimes when I write these I think about future Kevin reading all of this and wonder how you'll be then, how much we will have grown as people and as a couple. I wonder if you'll still have the mustache and how things will be with us.
You're home!!!
I love you so fucking much Kevin. I hope you see how much you mean to me.
Xoxo
M
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